Welcum back Moms+bros alike 2 the L.A. Nouveau NewsCntr: keeping u updated with the Wrld.
Found out some sleazy nuze this morning.
By now u may have seen the photo that is bumpin' nd grindin' All-Ovr-the-Interweb right now.
I'm talking about the photo of evry1's favey lil swimmer Michael Phelps.
N0, not this spotted: lilPhelps aka I.can.see.ur.peen photo.
NO, not this TRL-grrls want 2 touch ur BellyButton picture.
H8ed/miss u TotalRequestLive. Wondering what the No.1 music viddy wud have been 2day if TRL was still around... probably that My.Life.Wud.SUCK.Without.U song that evry1's been talking about / ive been blogging about.
NO ! NO ! NO !, i mean its cool that Phelpy-phelp is down with the AZNs, but srsly, none of these r the photo that i was referring 2.
Gonna explain the photo 2 u nd then it'll b posted at the end.
The photo, which hardly even looks that much like Mike , contains Michael Phelps... brace urselvs... hitting up a bong.
Like, of weed.
Nd the press is going nuts.
Some headlines I found 4 u's this morning:
- "Michael Phelps' Big Bong Theory"
- "Phelps Apologizes for Dopey Move"
- "Michael Phelps' Bong Incident: Are We To Blame?"
- "Phelps' Reputation Up In Smoke"
and my personal fave:
- "Michael Phelps' Pot Photo: When Kids' Heroes Fall"
So, I have a confession. Not gonna lie anymore.
I was nevr a big MichaelPhelpsFan.
Ive always had some respect 4 Phelps. I mean, he's a good kid nd all.
But I never rly liked him that much. Kinda borderline h8ed him. Just felt like he never "got" me.
I imagined that if we were 2 go on a lunch date evr, it probably wouldnt go well.
But thnx 2 the surfacing of this photo, I have 1 thing 2 say:
Phelps: Love u. No longer h8 u at all. Not even a lil.
Id like 2 conclude with a letter i just wrote 2 Michael Phelps.
Dear Mikey,
This is José. U know, the 1 from L.A. Nouveau.
I just wanted 2 Thank u. But srsly.
Thnx 4 being a Real Human.
Nd I wanted 2 say Im sry.
Sry that u have 2 hand out all these fake apologies 2 the NewsMediaFacist wrld.
I promise that if u ever cum 2 do an interview 4 the L.A. Nouveau NewsCenter that u would never have 2 give me any fake apologies.
Hope u can sleep easier 2nite.
Knowing that a hipster blogger now loves u.
Knowing that ppl now can relate better 2 u.
Knowing that I "get" u.
Glad 4 u that u have Weed in ur life 2 sometimes use on a once-in-a-while recreational basis.
Happy 4 u that u dont have 2 b in the closet about it anymore.
Hope 4 u that this doesnt stop u from getting high in the future.
Thnx again.
Swim On.
Fight On.
Beat the CuntyMoms aka MainstreamMedia.
With ruv, José
This.is.the.Photo.that.Ive.Been.Discussing.About
What wud u write 2 Michael Phelps?
Leave a comment of what u would write below nd maybe I'll send it on to him as a P.S. from my lil letter.
Tellin the Bitchslapped wrld off,
José
No comments:
Post a Comment