The Best Songs of the Yr R Here (via MusicNouveau)

The time of yr has finally cum.

No, Im not talking about XXXmas. Nor the Winter Solstice. Nor the "time 2 go see the inlaws again goddamit" time of yr.

Im talking about the time of yr 2 remember, 2 reflect, 2 enjoy the best of what 2kNine brought 2 us musically.

Im talking about ranking the top songs of the Yr.

Plz enjoy "The Best 50 Songs of 2kNine According 2 José" on MusicNouveau.

Many thnx nd happy holidays if ur still not too postmodern 2 celebrate them.

Peace + bitch,

José

Post 1 of a Pre-post to a Future Post called 1 YR L8R

Cuming soon 2 the L.A. Nouveau blog... a very special post borderline meme that will b titled
One Yr L8r: A Historical Look at the L.A. Nouveau Empire


This will b published throughout the 1 yr anniversary month of the L.A. Nouveau blog (which is October), a blog that started out as a simple way 2 vent about "modern society" bullshit.
A blog that went on 2 bcum an angsty analysis of "culturally relevant" (via HRO) topics.
A site that expanded in2 an entire "family"/"network"/choose.ur.own.Web2.0.description of blogs, tumblrs, sites, events, etc.

Nd while the blog itself has gone long ignored 4 the last several months, its ideas have only expanded further.

- Its expanded in2 a more "articulate" more "socially acceptable" more satirical Online Museum that is called Artifacts of Modernity, which can be viewed @ ArtofMod.com.

- Its wonderful musical postings have been all cumpiled in2 one central place called MusicNouveau (music being the things that r posted, nouveau being part of the name of the blog/”family network infrastructure”) which can b found @ MusicNouveau.tumblr.com.

- Its starvation 4 entertainment has been executed thru crazy events via L.A. Nouveau parties, 50% of which have resulted in some sort of legal/police intervention.

So as L.A. Nouveau continues 2 move fwrd in ways outside of the original blog, it feels like its good time 2 "look at our past" in order 2 "best understand the present" in order 2 "help us best succeed in the future".
Please join me on this magical journey thru teen angst, pseudo-hipsterdom, hyper-irony, meta-physical means 4 understanding the world around us.

So much has been said here/commented here/vented here/demonstrated here/symbolized here, nd while its been expressed in the cuntyest form evrr via lack of vowels nd disturbing bulletpoints nd etc., its overall quite a beautiful manifest of "human understanding" nd "sociological evolution".

ImportantNote: Sry if u ever felt "abandoned" by José via the lack of L.A. Nouveau blogposts. But if u couldnt tell already, the L.A. Nouveau spirit has far transcended this lil blog, nd I hope u've been able to experience that spirit thru other more "meaningful" avenues.

// The month of October will b an exciting time 4 the L.A. Nouveau family. //
Artifacts of Modernity has recently sparked interest from a rly cool online web business.
MusicNouveau has recently been reblogged quite a few times via tumblr.
Carles from Hipster Runoff now "follows" Artifacts of Modernity.
This season's first full-fledged L.A. Nouveau party is soon approaching.
Nd the blog will re-emerge as a place for historical analysis for at least the remainder of the month, nd who knows what will happen from there.

Thnx u's all 4 all ur support/h8/love, nd enjoy the memories that will flow throughout this lil Month of October.

Peace Love Bitch,
José

//
(looking fwrd 2 ur comments so plz leave something)

Back in the Game, Sortofs.

Intro: This is a BlogPost that begins by discussing my personal absence from the Blogosphere nd my decision 2 get back in the game a lil.

"2 Blog or not 2 blog" has been both Will Shakespeare nd my personal question of the last few weeks. With hardly any free moments in my lil ol life, L.A. Nouveau has hardly received much posting love of late. So much traveling has occurred (aka Get excited 4 some amazing destinations via the "José Meets World" meme), so many ppl met, so many landmarks defaced, etc.

But in the last few weeks, so much Music News has been pouring from out of evry lil hole and crack that I simply have no choice but 2 re-start up the L.A. Nouveau engines nd get this baby lubed cocked nd ready 2 fire once more. (U choose whether this was a SexualRefrnce or not)

This time, however, in order 2 bring u more up2date music findings, I have gone 2 the dark side via TUMBLR in order 2 supply u with the latest.

So, as of this very moment in time, I present 2 u all...

MusicNouveau. A place 4 José-approved Music. A place 2 quickly browse nd instantly download/listen 2 quality tunes. A place 4 losing urself in the music the moment you own it you better never let it go (sry bout that, started channeling Eminem there).

The link is this: MusicNouveau.tumblr.com

Nd here's a lil peek at whats cuming up in the next few days on MusicNouveau:

- Sufjan Stevens new album??? Zero 7's new genius creations. New song by Air. Imogen Heap has new shit 2. New band 2 watch 4: The Dodos. Nd more. Its all gonna b there.

This could b the greatest experiment of all time or the biggest flop of my career. Either way, u's all will b doing it with me.

Hope u bitchfully enjoy,

José

Where in the World [of non-L.A.] is José?

A long long time ago, the alt/hpstr/transsexual/hermo blog L.A. Nouveau presented 2 u's all a lil meme called "Where in the World [of L.A.] is José?"

The purpose of this meme was 2 help u connect 2 some interesting/cool/whatevr places around the Los Angeles, California-area.

Unfortunately, while there were many travels via José 2 many diffrnt areas of L.A., there was only 1 post on the topic ever.

(It was on Malibu. It can be read by clicking the following link: http://lanouveau.blogspot.com/2009/01/where-in-wrld-of-la-is-jose-bu.html *there r real live pics here of the L.A. Nouveau interns!!!*)

The logo looked something like this:

Just wanted 2 remind u of what this meme was like.

Nd I bring it up 4 good reason.

Bcuz since its SummerTime, L.A. Nouveau is "doing something crazy".

Something its never ever done b4 in its entire sporadic 8-months of existence.

José is leaving L.A.

(Gasps, shrills, moans, MariahCarey-highpitched-vocalShrieks, etc.)

Dont wrry, Ill b returning 2 L.A. eventually. This is only temporary 4 the Summer.

So instead of isolating myself in L.A., Im exploring the WRLD.

Nd along the way want 2 update u's all on the many Hipster Happenings beyond Los Angeles County, CA.

So get ready frnds/girlfrnds/boyfrnds/moms/dads(happyalmostfathersday, btdubbz)/NewlyGrads nd beyond, 4 a whole new L.A. Nouveau experience about Finding Hipster-ness/Blipster-ness all over the world.

I bring u:

JOSÉ meets WORLD.

- This is the first L.A. Nouveau meme that will actually b followed thru on / the first that there will actually b multiple postings on / the first that will b continually updated thruout the SummerMonths (As my frnds Friendly Fires/Au Revoir Simone once sang, "I promise, Im on it"). -

So get ready 4 some high quality commentaries + photos of the alt/blipster/hipster happenings found internationally from José's summer voyages around the wrld.

Wanna know what wonderful place on earth is first up?

Well I have news...

Im not telling.

Until 2morrow.

So check back 2 find out nd get ready 2 start living vicariously thru L.A. Nouveau.

Bitching is so INT'L,

José

The French: Supplying Us With Much

Aside from AZN's, hipsters, nd the Blogosphere, 1 of the more popular talking points of this blog has always been The.French.

In all past discussions of these mysterious/silly/cunty-but-loveable ppl, theyve been addressed bcuz of their amazing nd often superior music.

Nd with artists/singers/DJs/electrosluts like Uffie, Justice, Yelle, nd M83 just 2 name a very select few, its understandable y Im so often discussing the going-ons of the French music scene.

But there r so many othr things about the.French that we hardly ever address.

Such as their food.
Croissants = YumCity.
Nd a Baguette.with.Ham+Cheese is so "in" these days around lunchtimes.

(Thnx 2 FoodPornDaily 4 this wondrful pic of a potentially Paris-inspired sandwich)

Nd how about French fashion?
Paris has always been way ahead of the USofA in terms of its apparel/wears.




(both pixx courtesy of the many Lookbook postings of French ppl)

Just want some1 2 travel to Paris on my behalf 2 bring me back lots of vintage/chic apparel that I can wear in an effort 2 prove to my frnds/co-workers that Im more fashion-forward than them.
Assuming that this will lead them 2 in turn further question my sexuality.
Hoping that this wont effect the 3.on.3 BasketballTournament Im currently taking place in with a bunch of Bros who work a few cubicles down from mine.

But at the end of the day, no matter what else Paris/France/the.European.Union has 2 offer, its stellar music is what makes me continue writing about it.

So I continue 2day with a Parisian newcomer called Make the Girl Dance.
Theyve been tearing up blogs evrywhere 4 the last 2 weeks or so with a highly provacative/"SexyCanI" music viddy nd a SuperCatchy KindaCunty AbsolutelyBombtastic song called "Baby Baby Baby".

Here r some of the more memorable lyrics of the lil song translated in2 our more native tongue...

I want your Mom’s Black Amex. I want your Dad's car.

I want to go out with your mates. I will wear my cutest panties.

I want a hot sex session. You can look but you can’t touch.

I want to be Justice's top friend, I want Gaspard's hand on my thigh.

I want to be the only person in photos. And I want to model for Yves Saint Laurent.

I don't want any cake. I just want Coke.

I don't want Kate, I want Ethan Hawke.

I want ice cubes in my glass. I want to smoke dope with your grandma.

Nothings available 4 purchase yet in the US, but Im sure thats coming soon.

So 4 now, try 2 get some1 u know 2 go over 2 France nd purchase some of their music 4 u. Nd maybe theyll bring u back some EuroChic/Would.b.Gay.in.the.USA clothes that ull secretly fall in love with.

But until then, enjoy the music 4 free.
Watch the pretty.much.full.frontal music viddy here:

Make The Girl Dance "Baby Baby Baby" ( official video )

Nd here's the mp3 PLUS a bonus mp3 of a pretty great remix of the song by another French electronic duo called No Kiss With Gloss (this is a link 2 their myspace, u's all)


Make the Girl Dance - Baby Baby Baby (mp3)


Make the Girl Dance - Baby Baby Baby (No Kids With Gloss Remix) (mp3)


Je veux 2 bitch all nite,
José

A Guido's Role in the East Coast MTV Universe

Once upon a time, a long long time ago, back in the 19k's, a TeleVision Channel called Music TeleVision, or mtv as ppl liked 2 abbrev it, used 2 ditch their TimesSquare NewYorkCity studio evry summer nd would instead operate from what they liked 2 call
the MTV SummerBeachHouse.

This interesting seasonal meme was a favorite of many teens/tweens/20somthings growing up in the late 19ks nd early 2ks.

The annual summer special started in 1997 here in L.A., but then switched it up in 1998 to a very very vry different locale. They took the SummerBeach series away from the westcoast, bringing it far far beyond the classy beaches, palm trees, nd real surfers, instead moving on 2 the 1 nd only... Seaside Heights, NJ.


(scott gries was the probably mobbed phototaker here)

(This is not a joke.)
If uve been fortunate enough 2 actually visit Sleazeside Heights, New Jersey, then ur probably aware that its the last kind of place u'd expect MTV 2 wanna show off. But they mustve rly liked something about it, cuz they went back 2 Seaside Heights 4 yrs later for "MTV's Shore Thing" in 2oo2.

So what exactly did MTV see in whats often regarded as the sleaziest + trashiest of all the Jersey shore beaches?

Here's what:
Guidos.




(photo cred 2 hcwdbags)

Many L.A. hipsters/blipsters r lucky enough 2 never have actually met or come across a real-life Guido.
But 4 those who have, I apologize on NewJersey/NewYork's behalf.

Now, national pride is never rly a bad thing... Unless u take it 2 a level where u bcome so ItalianAmerican-obsessed that u only quote The Godfather, where the amount of gel in ur hair kills 3 species of wildlife a day, nd where ur skin color is far more orange than an aged pumpkin.

Nd while many Guidos dont actually even live in the state of NewJersey, they follow the same migratory patterns every summer around the same time.

Like birds, they use their natural-guido-instincts 2 gather all 2gether in Staten Island/Brooklyn around Memorial Day Wknd, drive out of the NYC-area all packed in several convertibles nd hummers, nd finally make their way down 2 the NewJersey beaches of Belmar, Pt. Pleasant, nd above all, Seaside Heights.
Its a migration that researches have been intensely studying 4 yrs, hoping 2 gather some new information on what the future of Guido-beach-hopping nd the Guido-movement could bring.

Before we depart, want 2 share 2 critical WebSites with u that will hopefully strengthen ur understanding of guidos.

Enjoy the following:
HotChickswithDouchebags.com - A superclassy photo site where many guido-looking douchebags happen to b in photos with hot girls.

nd lastly... NJ-Guido.com! Oh yes, this is real.

2 all the Italian stallion bitches,
José

A-Quick-Post: Believe Achieve

L.A. Nouveau presents "A-Quick-Post": a new kind of post thats quicker, shorter, nd more 2-the-point on updating u's all about life in the Nouveauniverse.

Here r some thoughts/tidbits/ideas:

- Swine Flu jokes r officially "less funny" than jokes about Clay Aiken's outed sexuality, MexiCNN reports. -

- Amrican Idul: is any1 still watching? Dont know any1 that still watches. Heard a rumor that my parents might still watch it. Im trying 2 get 2 the bottom of this fallacy. Miss u Sanjaya. -

- Im trying 2 brainstorm some creative things that I can do with all of the face masks I bought 2 weeks ago when all my frnds said I would die from the Swine if I didnt. Could make some nifty bday presents. I heard theyre still worth a lot in China, Toronto, nd other SARS-affected cities. Maybe next time I go on tour with my Indie/PunkRokk/Hipster/Hampster band, we'll perform wearing face masks. Nd then can throw them out 2 all our fans at the end of the show. Perfect. -

- Wondring how HilaryDuff is doing these days. Havent seen her in a while/am a lil nervous 4 her wellbeing. -

- FoxNews' indienews channel FxNws reports that 78% of ppl still think that Terri Schiavo is totally do-able. Brett Michaels has more on that story -

- Finally, (FINALLY!), life is particularly stressful at the moment 4 many of the college kids out there dealing with finals, moving back home 4 the summer, getting sucked down corporate loopholes in order 2 find "meaningful jobs", etc. I wish all of u's good luck at this daunting time of yr.

As my good frnds at Cansei de Ser Sexy, commonly referred to as CSS, would say:

"Believe Achieve".

Enjoy the José-fave musical number below:

CSS - Believe Achieve (artist name is a link 2 their myspace. just trying 2 promote the bands 2 u's.)

"I wanna b just like u Bitch," - CSS

José

So Tell Me, Have U Seen Her?: A Meme Is Born

L.A. Nouveau presents a new Meme 2 add 2 its already enormous collection of hardly viral Memes.

Let me introduce u the Newest thang now.

Presenting: Have U seen this AZN???

There r a lot of AZN's (asians, 4 those of u who are still hipster-illiterate) in this lil country of ours.

Actually, they make up only about 5% of the USofA.

But they make up a shitload of areas like California, LosAngeles, nd IvyLeague schools.

Bcuz of their overwhelming presence in many places like L.A., an overbearing issue has arisen: how 2 tell them apart.

4 whatever reason, it can often b very hard 2 distinguish 1 AZN from the next.

But maybe if we focus more attention on distinguishing specific AZN ppl, it will bcum easier 2 tell em all apart.
Nd by telling them apart, we can better understand the things they do, what motivates them, what prompts their unknown azn actions, etc.

Nd thus, I bring u:

Have U seen this AZN???

2days AZN:

So... Have U seen this AZN???

She was last seen totally screwing up ppl's school projects by not being able 2 formulate her words correctly nd thus wasting all of the time the othr presenters had 2 speak during.

Shes also been known 2 refute other ppl's ideas by using big words that dont come out correctly bcuz of her lacking English skills.

Additionally, she recently travelled 2 HongKong where she felt generally more accepted in2 society bcuz of her AZNness nd her Westernized-meets-Chechnya sense of style.

In the future, she plans 2 remain generally subdued by AmericanSociety despite her high-level B.S./B.A. in economics/InternationalRelations.

She also enjoys eating Dumplings, nd other AZNnation food/drink-things/brightly-colored-nuclearly-radiated-rice-produced items.

So Have U seen this AZN??? Share where/when/what this AZN was doing when U saw it.

(Even if this isnt necessarily the AZN u saw, Im sure u've recently seen 1 like this, so please share ur sensitive story regardless)

Leave a comment. Share a tale.
Nd remember 2 email jose@LAnouveau.com if u come across a noteworthy AZN that ur wondering if ppl have seen recently.

Looking for more AZN bitches 2 blog about,
José ≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠